“Chuckles. The Joe Team's resident undercover specialist is said to be on loan to the team by the CIA... the NSA... the DOD... or some other clandestine acronym spoken about in hushed tones.
He’s been with the team since the late 80s or was it the 90s. Seems his file is full of holes. His DOB, place of birth, real name, social security number, all of it scrubbed from all public records. He looks like he hasn’t aged a day, although no one can remember what he looked like yesterday let alone last year. It’s strange.”
“Where is he now?”
“No one knows.”
“No one?”
“That’s correct, Senator.”
“How on Earth is that possible?” The frustration, anger, and fear show plainly on the man’s face. “Damn it. We pay him good money.” He wipes the sweat from his forehead with a pristine white handkerchief. “What about the other reports? The one’s about…” His voice trails off.
“Cobra.” The General has been through this before. Reporting to this Senator or that Congressman. Answering to this committee or that hearing. He knows what’s coming.
The senator looks up, “Yes. Is it true? Did he defect?”
“Senator if the reports are true he was never really a Joe to begin with.”
“Do you know what this means?” The man who yelled obscenities at those “commie liberals” on television, who never backed down from a fight, who would attack a man rather than his position until all that remained was a puddle of mud, was terrified.
Unexpectedly the door to the posh private corner office opens. The men turn expecting to yell at some hapless intern interrupting their conversation. “It means I know where the bodies are buried.” The suppressor does its job. Before either man can react black holes appear in the centers of their foreheads. A red trickle begins to make its way down their faces, slowly at first. Their limp bodies fall.
________________________
That was the last known conversation about the man known as Chuckles to take place before THEY came. A man who worked with the Joes for years, who was entrusted with information far above his pay grade, who time and again came through for the team with information, bodies, or prisoners. He didn’t erase the recording of the senator and general’s conversation. A camera whose location he knew exactly as he looked directly into the lens making no attempt to hide his identity. There was no need, no one knew who he really was.
From what’s been learned the man known as Chuckles may have in fact been a double agent for Cobra the whole time. Some say he is Cobra Commander’s son, the famed and feared Agent X-99. It didn’t help matters that Chuckles avoided Mercer, the former Cobra Viper turned Joe. Records show they only interacted one time and Mercer immediately went to General Hawk with his concerns. He claims he had seen Chuckles with Cobra Commander on several occasions. His concerns were written off as either fantasy or perhaps he and seen Chuckles while he was deep undercover. Mercer claimed afterwards that Hawk dismissed him and when tried to press the issue the general threatened him with a Court Marshall.
He still has his defenders, though they are few and far between. Those who claim it was a setup, that Chuckles was framed, that perhaps it was Zartan or one of his ilk.
All we know for certain, is that he has a price on his head. The highest in the land.
If you see him. Kill him.
